do we make each other this way
Published Tuesday, November 29, 2005 by Anonymous | E-mail this post
poem follows (stupid blogger post limitations, the form is almost entirely lost. I will have to figure out some way around this.):
do we make each other this wayi met allusions on the subway train last night after dark, though after dark is meaningless under ground when dark has no after and no before.
pop
engine
tired from concerted escapism my efforts have gone home. their refrains aren’t the same way i’m thinking about them. but how else to say them.
• REMEMBER NOT TO ASK QUESTIONS WITH NO ANSWERS IN MIND
(can this be avoided through punctuation)
circles and policies
havealwaysbeen exercises in
broken
physics of fracture
equations of evasions
ppo
eengin
can you flail more clearly? can you drown better next time? the next time you can’t take anymore, would you please just take some more?all good questions, but the OC isn’t answering anymore fan mail.
opp
neengi
timeless dark was mentioned before. it has since found a watch, so forget it. the engineering is swiss.
• REMEMBER THAT IN RECANTING YOU SHOW YOUR ARE WEAK
(try to frown with dignity the cameras are rolling)
Impressed by your wilingness to stretch a wierd sort of structure that isn't really a structure and challenge language with variations on "pop" and "engine". While I ca understand engine as being a important word and the need to transform and repeat it I'm not so sure about "pop". It doesn't hold the same sort of capital within the poem as engine does. I view this poem as sections which is good, I'm a huge fan of sections and pieces and chunks in writing (esp the opening about dark although i might consider condensing it down by taking out "when dark has no after and no before" because I think the reader can make that connection his/herself). However, I'm having a hard time going between the sections and making connections, letting the sections speak completely to each other, which i think can be fixed partly by the formatting problem you've discussed (using the page spatial to make connections easier with line/phrase placement) and partly by finding a stronger word than "pop".